Miscarriage: Hanging on to Hope

Read Miscarriage: The Pregnancy, Miscarriage: A Death in the Family, and Miscarriage: Looking for Answers

So what will we do?

I have come up with a few ideas already. For one, I talk about her and won’t stop. I know I am a much more vocal person than most, so not everyone has to be so open about their story, but it is still important to find your own ways to honor your baby in Heaven.

We have named her Hope! I imagine she was and is beautiful!!

Our sweet friends Krystle and Patrick have given us the gift of a Hope plant! The plant hasn’t arrived yet but I look forward to taking care of this plant daily as I would have taken care of our sweet Hope. I wait patiently for the arrival as I would have waited while carrying sweet Hope through the pregnancy.

I also found a site called Peace of Mind that was started by a couple after the loss of one of their precious babies. She makes jewelry and sells them on Etsy. They are beautiful and such a precious way for me to carry Hope with me everywhere. I am getting a necklace with her sweet name on it. I know that everyday as I wear that necklace I will be reminded of my sweet third child! Also, all of her sales are going towards them adopting another child!! What an amazing way for me to celebrate Hope’s very short-lived life.

We have also decided to have a very small ceremony to remember her and celebrate her. I know this may seem silly to a lot of people, which is why we are doing it so small and not inviting hardly anybody (I don’t want anyone to feel weird or that it is silly I am doing it). I have a few ideas on what I want to do, but had a hard time finding stuff online. I did find this one miscarriage support site with some suggestions. I am thinking a letter, maybe balloons, scripture readings and prayer of course. I look forward to this ceremony and time to put to rest my sweet girl.

Mother’s of miscarried babies: no matter how recent or how long ago it was, no matter how far along in to the pregnancy you were, do what you need and want to do to honor that baby. Grieve and hurt. Rejoice for that life. Name your baby. Do what you know you want to do, but do not let anyone tell you that baby wasn’t yours or wasn’t a baby yet. No one can take that little one from you, so cherish that gift you were given. No matter how short-lived it was, it was still a gift. And I thank God for that gift. Even in my anger.

As I told a friend, I feel like I am holding it together and falling apart all at the same time.

I love you sweet Hope! Mommy can’t wait to hold you one day.

What ways did you celebrate your baby? What do you do to remember your baby?